Saturday, August 25, 2007

Motivation???

Guess I'll have to place this blog in hiatus.......

My health, after all the questions, tests, scares, etc., is G-O-O-D!

This makes my premise of tracking my journey through sickness and distress, somewhat silly.

I will leave the blog here in the event I suffer some problem....or my Duchess does, in the near future.....

I sincerely hope the blog is not needed.....

Thanks for those who wrote, and supported......

Duke

Thursday, July 12, 2007

I Am Blessed! - The News Is Good, But Not For My Brother!

Balances seem to be involved....I am just not sure how!

I had my ultrasound Tuesday.....actually of several areas......

My Aorta is OK.....also my veins behind my knees (did you know that was a spot for aneurysms????), and most-importantly....my carotids......OK all around.

Meanwhile younger Brother Mark had a mild stroke. He is facing drugs, and changes, but the news was not all bad.....his carotids are also fairly good.....

Just as life hands us a lemon, we sometimes get lemonade thru some work on ourselves.

YES, I am still walking 2-3 miles 4-5 days each week.

Duke

Friday, July 6, 2007

The Beat Goes On......& The Testing Too!

Well folks, it ain't over til the fat lady sings, and she has not even signed in yet!

I visited a new doc yesterday.....a Vascular Surgeon, also lined up by my boss. This guy is state-of-the-art in vascular and stents area.

He and his resident (He is with USF) did a quite good work up on me. Then he stated that since I have an aneurysm.....turns out the terminology here is somewhat vague, depending upon which doc you are seeing....he sees a future of watching, but told me if you have a possible aneurysm then 25% chance for same with your siblings, and 5% chance for your kids......

In addition, next Tuesday I undergo ultrasound of my belly area, femorals (where leg meets body), and my carotids.....plus the veins behind my knees.....

Those are the areas prone to aneurysm if you have any such symptoms at all.

The man was quick, thorough, and very, very knowledgeable. I am blessed, as Jerry Speak would pronounce. Blessed with my connections to a major hospital, and blessed with good docs....probably they go hand-in-hand!

My tests are Tuesday.

Duke

Friday, June 29, 2007

I am Changed!

No matter the positive (apparently....we'll know in one year....giggle) outcome of my mind-numbing recent prospects for a very rocky future, I still find I am a changed person.

Oh, no I am not referring to a sudden renewal of my religious positions and actions, but rather a now-apparent-to-me awareness that, at 64 years of age, I am mortal.

I remember well thinking in my 30s and my 40s that life could be short. I then had a goal of making it to the turn of the century. That was when i was 58, and at that point I would be older than my father when he passed. He nearly died at 47, and frankly given the state of medicine then about his coronary artery disease it is amazing he made it to 57.

When 2000 came and went and I was still apparently fine, I somehow made a quantum leap of faith that 75-90 was realistic. My prognostication, albeit it mostly a mental, non-written or spoken thing, was based upon my study of the family tree. Many of my male relatives lived into their late 80s, and even mid-90s....and this when the average lifespan was WAY lower.

The events of the past weeks have sobered my euphoria a bit and made me aware I need to take ownership of my health. Much more than I have been doing.

We shall see if I stick to this.

We shall see what comes next in my movement into a new world of awareness!

Duke

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Time tells ALL.....

The fact of my brief postings during my apparent problems with Lungs/Heart/Aorta/etc. are sure symbols of the fact that nothing is cast in concrete in this modern medical technical time....

I am blessed from many viewpoints.....

I am blessed from MY viewpoint!!!

I thank whatever gods that be for the information.....

Duke

PHEW!!!! - The Situation Dissipates!

I have been contemplating just how to write this......

But first.....I am OFF THE HOOK on the reported "aneurysm".

My delay was as I feel almost like I stole something from someone. I read the tales at other sites of continuing battles, and suddenly find I apparently do not have one. More to the point Instapundit & GM Roper as well asothers, including my online high school friends from 46 years ago sent much encouragement and support. My prayers will remain with each and every one of them.

Now the story: I mentioned in my last post that my boss (I am retired, but still on-contract at the hospital) was getting involved. That was an understatement!

Yesterday morning Duchess and I met with him at 9am. After he worked thru the CAT Scan report of aneurysm and CAD (coronary artery disease), he made some calls.

By 1pm I was meeting with the lead thoracic surgeon who is nationally-known. We sat in the boss's conference room as he examined me and went online to review the written CAT Scan report as well as the actual "slices" in the scan. He announced I DO NOT have an aneurysm....I have a slightly enlarged aorta which may have been that way all my life. We are a good bit away from a dangerous aneurysm. He also pronounced the CAD to be minor and in-line with my age of 64.

By 3:45 I was with my own cardiologist, also courtesy of a call from the boss. He concurred with the thoracic surgeon.

Results of the entire episode? I have one new med to keep my systolic blood pressure reading down. I will have follow-up CAT Scan at 6 and 12 months, just to make sure all is static.....and, I get an ultrasound of my carotids, despite the fact both docs felt they are open. This last bit is due family history of BAD carotids.

Soooo....

In a brief period of a few weeks I have gone from a cough to an x-ray revealing a shadow on my lung to a CAT Scan reported as showing an aneurysm and CAD to an apparent normal reading.......and no surgery, additional major actions, etc.

Incredible, and I am still reeling about and trying to get back in focus.

How marvelous today's technological advances are, and how great to have been "in the right place at the right time" as far as my employment and contacts go. Not everyone is so fortunate as to work for one of the top cardiac hospitals in the nation (#4 in heart transplants)...and to work for the man with the hammer to help me so much.

As I said I feel both fortunate and a bit embarrassed by it all.

Thanks again to Instapundit who directed me to GM Roper who gave encouragement and advice...primary among those things was "maintain a positive attitude"...here's his post about my site.

Thank you both for your support and caring.

Duke

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Positive Approach!

Many, many hours of thought......some facts i put forth......

1. I can have little impact on what is ongoing other than following some basic rules, and taking good advice.

2. I need to go on planning my life as if this is a bus stop, not a resting place...I am doing so with plans/reservations for November Thanksgiving, etc.

3. Life is something in which we need to be more involved.....Does that sound like BS? It is NOT. Sometimes i find I (and I am sure I am not alone) get into my rut and just go along allowing my set schedule to rule. It is time for some innovation/relaxation/travel .....that is, after all, why I retired in the first place.

4. Your strongest support comes from places expected, and unexpected....Duchess, a cardiac surgical nurse by trade, though retired, has been a stalwart, supportive person. I know she is worried as she has talked with one daughter with whom she has great communication. That was one of her support lines. My boss at the hospital, I did not expect to get involved. He has, and tomorrow I'll find out just how much. He is a very, very learned man with mental abilities far beyond my own, and a knowledge of medicine which eclipses mine...not to mention his position which can provide me an insider help most cannot enjoy. That is a blessing.

Just thoughts, but there should be some kernels of truth in there....

Duke

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Thinking, Realization, Worry

Things are moving so slowly it seems more like a film being run at half-speed.

I am going to be waiting until Wednesday to get much more information. My person physician's office called and his nurse said they wanted me to get with a thoracic surgeon as soon as possible.

What I am doing....and it is a blessing that I was employed where I was prior to retiring (& still am on contract there for work from home and at the hospital)...is meeting with the chief physician of the hospital who is apparently stepping right in to guide me. His contacts are much greater than mine....his knowledge light years ahead of mine.

At this point I am aware of two problems.....the aneurysm in my ascending aorta, and an apparent calcification in my aorta and other areas since I had a heart cath 13 years ago and was clean. That is not good news. My mother and grandmother died of just such calcification.

The aneurysm is apparently small. Hopefully. It may even be something that can wait for a while to be addressed. The team at the hospital is working on a procedure to use stents in the ascending aorta. Currently they do this in the descending aorta. That is preferable as it keeps from "cracking open" the chest to do regular surgery.

Obviously, at this point i am only engaged in speculation. The feeling of recognizing my own mortality is really not where I wanted to be right now.

Duke

Friday, June 15, 2007

Diagnosis In - WHEW!

At least - partially......

I had to pull strings through my old employer this morning to get the report from my Monday CT Scan......not sure why it dragged.

Two pages boil down to:

1. The lung shadow is old granuloma (sort of a calcification) with NO problem....I appear to have so far dodged the BIG C!

2. The report found an ascending aorta aneurysm......Unfortunately no size given. This must be small or they would have pursued it immediately. They call for monitoring it.

More later

Duke

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Waiting....Waiting....What To Do!

The time is S-L-O-W.....the items for consideration are many.

However, I continue to try to blank them out until I have some reply....some form of knowing what IS, or at least what is possible.

The choices seem to me to be.....

A) I have something abnormal.......Then we plan to determine what are the potentials for finding out WHAT! &&& What can we do to determine what the problem is and what do we do to work to solve the problem....

B) I have NO problem, and I will then try to find what impact this event has had upon me, and will have upon my life....

BUT......

I wait......

Duke

Monday, June 11, 2007

CAT SCAT.....Done

Well, that procedure is a snap......

CT (known as CAT) is a method of looking inside at the tissue.....

In this case it is a metal wall with a circular hole in the middle. You lay on a small trolley-type bed and the thing moves up and down your body snapping whatever iot is they call the type of views they get from the machine.

I had a needle in the hand for the "media"......they did my scan twice....once with no media and once with media (a liquid they inject into you which highlights areas in your body.......)

Now the wait......two days they said......Wednesday afternoon I'll be calling my Doc to check the report.....nervous!

Duke

Friday, June 8, 2007

Moving Ahead?

Time nears for the all-important CAT Scan.

As it does, and the window from here to there narrows, I find it much harder to ignore the possibilities. Duchess is having a rough time with her shoulder rehab. Pain is with her all the time, and it is wearing her down....even as she moves toward kick-starting the movement of her own arm.

Despite this pressure, she is there for me. This past week i went into a two day blue funk! Nothing I can lay my finger on, but probably in some contorted way related to the upcoming test....perhaps more to the results of said test.

One of the things which i find amazing is the way my sights have narrowed down, and shortened in scope of time. Plans for vacations, RV trips, etc. are sitting there. I see no reason to plan until I know more. Defeatist attitude? Probably....and not a good one. We have not yet told any of our kids nor family. Will not burden them unless it is fact. Perhaps it will all go away and I'll look back and say "What the heck was I worried about?" Perhaps not.

We have tentative plans for a Thanksgiving trip to the Houston area to be with daughter and family there. Thinking also of a trip to Illinois in July to see another daughter and family. Cannot bring myself to make reservations at campgrounds yet.

Let's see what next week brings.

Duke

p.s. Thanks to Jerry for a nice comment and support....!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Coasting/Ignoring????

I guess I am in the state of "not-there-yet, just ignore it!"

I am scheduled in the 2nd week of June for my CT (CAT) Scan.....That is a long time to wait...It is also a long time for my brain to find reason for the concerns, or lack-thereof....

Doctor's nurse tells me" We have false readings often".....Brain tells me...."You have Cancer!"

God, I hope "Brain" is wrong!

If not, then we will live with it...Duchess and I....for I know she will be the rock of my life if I face a really bad thing.

Waiting!

Duke

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Things!

Things.....

Life, once lived as if there were no rules......NOPE!

I have never felt that. I have had a really intense relationship with the potential/possibility for death most of my adult life.

I knew at a fairly young age (perhaps my 20s?) that the males of my family have a strange habit of dying at a quite young age.......

Cases in point: Uncle Ona (Father's brother) died in his early 40s of a heart attack in bed....My three Uncles from my Mother's side died at fairly young ages.....46 to 62......My Grandfather on my Dad's side died of a heart attack as did my Grandmother, his wife....one lived to 52, one til 62....

My Dad had his first heart attack at 47......lived for 11 more years with three more heart attacks til he died at 58. My Mom had REALLY bad plaque in her arteries.....had three carotid surgeries (one a re-do) and died after a last-ditch attempt at giving her three-five more years.....

My Sister (three years younger) died at 47 of a massive heart attack.

My Brother (9 plus years younger) has had heart attack...and bypass surgery....

My Sister 1 year younger has had carotid surgery, two bypass surgeries, and is ready for another carotid surgery which she refuses.....

I am the eldest!

My family is NOT healthy....I have been to this point......I remember, however, really seriously wondering if I'd make it to the year 2000...... That seems stupid now, but in 1990 it was a goal......I'd be 57 (1 year younger than my Father at his death), and hoped for life to then.

Now at 64, this is long gone, but the lung lump (?) is a question....

Makes one wonder......Why am I fairly immune to the things most of my family have?

Who knows? I have speculated.....different genes (different Father????)....That is a bad speculation, but related to the fact my own Aunt (Mother's Sister) had a kid at a young age and gave him to Older Brother as HIS kid.....

This is not a proper speculation as my Mom and Dad married 12 months (minus 11 days) before my birth! They married January 12th....1942..... I was born January 1st, 1943.

All of it matters not, of course, as the only thing that does matter is WHERE am I?....How long will I live.....

How long do my Duchess and I have together??? How long will we get to watch our Grandkids grow, develop, marry, etc.?

That is what matters......

We'll begin the process of living TODAY...and continue thru the weekend as we leave Tampa tomorrow in our motorhome for Cortez (Bradenton, FL) for the holiday weekend!

Duke

The Waiting Begins!

I have an appointment for my CT Scan.....

June 12th......gotta wait til then.

Tick...Tock...Tick...Tock!

Meanwhile Duchess is in touch with docs who do the kind of chest/lung work I might need.....(She is a retired surgical nurse with lots of contacts!) Bless my Lady for her support and pushing.

Duke

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Better During The Day - Some Good News(?)

Daylight dimmed some of the demons of my 1st night after the phone call from my doctor. A visit to the doctor's office to obtain a prescription for the needed CT-Scan also brought reassurance from two sources......

The actual X-Ray analysis stated a "possible" nodule in a lung. It asked the CT-Scan to determine the reality of such. The nurse told me this was often brought forward, and usually a false-alarm.

Hopeful!

I honestly feel better about this and have focused on two things......

1st - Don't go borrowing trouble until you know there is trouble!
2nd - Deal with life on my brother's rules (he had lymph-node cancer at mid-twenties and is now 55 and doing very well still in complete remission) His rules: Don't sweat the small stuff......and IT IS ALL small stuff!

Moving on.

Tomorrow I make the CT appointment....

Duke

1 Night Down.....WOW!

I did not sleep at all well. A diverse, sometimes completely nonsensical parade of thoughts kept creeping in.

It would seem I am in that shock period of knowing something really bad could be wrong, and still not having the time nor knowledge to get my arms around it.

I saw the clock from our 11pm bedtime until at least 3am. Then I was really groggy when we awoke this morning. Had to get up to take Duchess to her water class. She cannot yet drive after her recent shoulder surgery.

My night thoughts:

Glad we completed those wills.
Is there going to be surgery?
Do I face radiation/chemo?
Grandpa, Mother's side, died of lung cancer. (course he was a three pack Camel man)
Should we do a quick reschedule to get in our Rhine Cruise before I get into something that will restrict our movement/travel?

Duchess has already moved to support and encourage. I knew she would. We are pretty tight as a couple.

Lots more thoughts rumbling around, but now off to the docs to pick up a prescription so i can go have my "Cat Scat" (CT Scan).

We're booked at a nearby campground for the weekend in our motorhome. We'll be doing that before any CT Scan.

More later.

Duke

Monday, May 21, 2007

It Begins.....

I today had a really, really scary phone call. I thought about the ramifications of what I am about to experience and have decided to blog it as it goes.....perhaps in a separate blog (as you can see...that is what I did!).....we'll see.

I have been coughing for some time. I blame it on my "terminal" post-nasal drip. A visit to the doctor last week brought elimination of one of my blood pressure drugs which, in some people, causes coughing.

In addition the doc sent me for an X-Ray of my chest. That was last Friday.

This morning the scary call from the doc's office. "Mr. DeLand, your X-Ray indicates a nodule on your lung."

Now they want a "CAT Scan" (CT Scan).....that delivers pictures slice-by-slice of my lungs for the docs to review. THEN we know if, indeed, we have a problem.

Scary!

Lots of things come drifting through my mind......My Maternal Grandfather died of lung cancer. Of course he was a confirmed 3 pack-per-day Camel smoker. I have never smoked cigarettes, and only on occasion smoked pipe or cigar.....nothing for probably 6-8 years..... When I did the pipe/cigar thing I did not inhale, and I usually smoked 1-2 times per month. Not the likely candidate for smoking-related problems!

How much does heredity play in this scenario?

Now to the CAT Scan and determination if I am waving a flag of problem before necessary.

Stay tuned kiddies!

Duke

(This taken from my base blog......I am keeping this information from there for now as I have not even told my kids.....)

Thus It begins.....

I am setting up this blog as a means of tracking, and following the results of a recently-found lump on my lung.

I shall post as I go, and be honest (to the best of my ability).....

Duke